


If You Want to View Paradice.

by TayBartlett9000



Category: Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams, hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy (tv 1981)
Genre: Destruction, Earth, Friendship, Gen, Golgafrinchan, Guilt, Hope, Humanity, Kindness, Lighthearted, b ark, non-romantic, paradice, positivity, pre-historic earth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-19
Updated: 2018-03-19
Packaged: 2019-04-04 16:04:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14023779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TayBartlett9000/pseuds/TayBartlett9000
Summary: Arthur and Ford have arrived on pre-historic Earth along with a group of aliens who form the uesless third of their planet's population. Arthur  is slightly despirited by their actions towards his homeworld and Ford tries to reassure him. Earth is still a beautiful place, is it not?





	If You Want to View Paradice.

If You Want to View Paradice

 

 

The sun was slowly setting below the horizon of pre-historic Earth, red glimmers arking across the sky as the clouds drifted aimlessly above them.

Ford Prefect and Arthur Dent sat upon a hill, as far away from the  useless Golgafrinchan  settlers of the B ark as they possibly could, watching mesmerised as a column of fire billowed up from a large cluster of trees to the west of  their hiding place.

Arthur sat rather awkwardly at Ford’s side, slightly disconcerted by the immense spell of silence that had now settled between them. He could hear the low hum of some insect or other in the trees – an insect who’s origin he didn’t know. He could no longer hear the voices of the settlers from the B ark, and guessed quite rightly that their actions were the cause of the fire now throwing up ploooms of black smoke and filling the air with an acrid stench of burned wood and leaves.

“Wow,” Ford muttered after a short pause, “now that is really something. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything so beautiful in my life.”

Arthur automatically turned to see where Ford was directing his comment. As usual, he couldn’t find the source of his apparent amazement. He was pointing at nothing and looking at nothing in particular.

“What is?” Arthur asked, voice heavy with weary uncertainty. Conversations with Ford Prefect were always complicated ones, no matter how simple the premise of that conversation was.

“What is what?” Ford asked, as if puzzled.

Arthur sighed and rolled his eyes heavenward. “What is beautiful?” he asked, barely consealing the  exasperation in his tone, “are you talking about the sunset? It is  really a beautiful sight, isn’t it?”

Ford shook his head. He had visited many planets, and most of them had sunrises and sunsets of some description. Some planets even had two sons, which did  lend itself to incredible visages of red and orange flames flowing  across the sky. This particular  sunset impressed him not at all. “No,” he said calmly, “I’m talking about the burning trees. That’s the most incredible sight I’ve ever seen.”

Arthur remained silent. He could never understand why Ford was so  inthused by   such things. Watching his young planet dying around him was cutting deep into his soul as if his body, rather than the trees,   was receiving the full effect of those  flames.

“I’ll never understand you, Ford,” he told his traveling companion with a trace of anger colouring his voice, “why in the name of hell would you find burning trees interesting? It’s bloody awful, that’s what it is.”

He lapsed into silence, wishing he had the courage to look up again at those rising flames, and angered by the fact that he could do nothing to prevent the Golgafrinchans from destroying the trees of Earth.

“I  never wanted to see that,” Arthur blerted, unable to stop himself. He pointed at the  billowing clouds of   smoke still rising from the west, shaking his head  in resignation.

“What do you mean?” his companion asked, leaning back on his elbows, the better to observe the red glow that was now the brightest thing in the skies.

Arthur rubbed a hand across his aching eyes, suddenly aware of the  heady tang of wood smoke filling his nostrils. “I never wanted to be here and watch the planet being  destroyed by a group of   incompitants. Don’t  you understand, Ford, we brought them here? It’s our fault that the Earth is being destroyed. Some human I am.”

Ford shrugged. He had seen far worse phenomena than this. “It’s not that bad, Arthur old mate,”  he told him, in as soothing a voice as he possibly could. He pointed at the  blazing forest  to their right and frowned. “It was going to happen anyway.”

Arthur nodded. “I know that,” he replied sadly, “ I know that the vogons will destroy Earth in two  million years time, but I just wish there was some way we could save what’s left of this planet before humanity and the vogons have their way with it, that’s all.”

Again, Ford shrugged. “There’s nothing wrong with Earth as it is now, Arthur,” he told his friend gently, wishing that they could change the subject. He didn’t like gloomy conversations, and Arthur seemed to be rather good at beginning and continuing in these sorts of conversations. “The Earth is a far more beautiful place than some planets I’ve seen.”

Arthur was unconvinced. “Oh, come off it,” he said disssmissively, “look at the place. We’ve only been on Earth for a day or so and already things are dying out. The trees are being destroyed, the Golgafrinchans are  over   there  at the bottom of this hil making documentaries about  themselves, and the cavemen are  dying out all over the place. Humanity’s going to die before they even have a  chance. How is that fare?” He paused, aware of his rising voice and  clenched fists, which he allowed to fall uselessly into his lap as his tirade ended.

These words made no impression on his Betelgeusian companion who could only smile in reply. “That is true, mate,” he said, still in that calm and unconcerned manner, “but if you’d look around, you’d see that this is still an extremely beautiful planet.”

Shaking his head, Arthur fixed his gaze on the ground. “I can’t see what’s so beautiful about this planet,” he said quietly, voice taking on a dispirited  quality that Ford had never before heard from his friend’s lips.

 Ford reached out to gently touch  Arthur’s arm, causing his friend to look up and give him his full attention. “Take a look around you, Arthur,” he told him earnestly, “this is a very beautiful planet. The rich oceans, the greenery all around us, the  wildlife in the forests, even the cavemen. Those Golgafrinchans can’t destroy this  planet. They can’t even come close. Not yet, anyway. We’ve come home to a paradice, Arthur.” He paused,  realising that he had been far too sentimental for his liking. What had come over him? Ford  Prefect was never usually your sentimental sort. Now he was spewing  superlatives like it was going out of fashion. He shook his head  and added in a winning voice, “besides, whatever happens to the Earth in the future, it’ll be a much better future than some. I heard of a planet somewhere in the Sirius star system that got used as a ball in a game of intergalactic football.”

Arthur smiled inspight of himself. “Oh,” he said, “and what happened to it?”

“Well, it went ok for a while, everyone was happy enough and the people of the planet had no idea it was going on at first, but then the opposition got a bit carried away and the little planet got  kicked straight into a black hole. Killed sixteen billion people.”

“Gosh,” Arthur said with obvious surprise,”what an awful thing to happen to a young planet. Makes our own future look like a walk in the park, doesn’t it?” He shrugged, grudgingly choosing to accept his strange companion’s logic, though still unwilling to look back up at the now dying fire beyond  their vantage point. “I suppose you’ve got a point,” he said finally, “it could be worse, couldn’t it?”

Ford nodded with furver. “An awful bloody lot worse,” he  agreed. Rising to his feet, he began to make his way back down the hill, looking back at Arthur who was still sitting  resolutely on the grass.

“Well,” he called, “are you coming? Let’s get down there and go and join the new human race. It’s getting bloody cold out here.”

Nodding reluctantly, Arthur stood and made his way down the hill to  join Ford. He  could  think of no reason to remain  alone up there on the hills. He and his friend would be  better off remaining part of the group of telephone  sanitisers and hair dressers, though he didn’t trust a single one of these people. As he followed the Betelgeusian down the hill and towards the crowd that were now gathered around a  smaller fire, Arthur Dent took a cursery look round him, and saw the wild beauty that Ford had been talking about. Rich green grass crunched beneath his feet, and his ears caught the sound of the babbling water ahead of him. The insects hiding in the trees and shrubs added their melodies to the quickly gathering night and even Arthur had to smile.

 Ford did indeed have a point. For now at least, the planet Earth was a paradice. He had no idea  for how long this peace and natural prosperity would last, but he was  content for the moment to put his trust in nature. One day, the vogons would come and blow the entire planet to atoms, but not quite yet. He allowed Ford to lead him into the thick of the group of  Golgafrinchans, and Arthur  surrendered his  misgivings and took  his place by the fire, listening to the joyful  conversation going on around him.

At least he wasn’t alone. That was something.

 

“If you want to view paradice, simply look around and view it.”

Gene  Wilder.


End file.
